An old one
Submitted by Saint on Tue, 02/10/2004 - 10:28am. Wisdom
"I don't care if it's green, a moose is not a jungle animal."

--one cake decorator talking to another, Wal-Mart, Cortez, CO. Originally posted in the old "Passed By" section; I was reminded of it yesterday because we finally sold the moose.
Words to Live By
Submitted by Desert Fox on Mon, 02/09/2004 - 5:09pm. Wisdom
"DO NOT knock down trees with vehicles."

-- Good advice from the two of clubs in the ITAM playing cards
Board Chair
Submitted by nerdgrrl on Fri, 02/06/2004 - 10:28am. Wisdom
There's a chance that if we choose to endorse a candidate next year, that candidate will be a memeber of one party, and not the other.

- Board Chair, at a meeting to discuss whether our PAC should endorse a candidate in the presidential election
22 January 2004
Submitted by eve on Fri, 01/23/2004 - 1:38am. Wisdom
"Because anything that is not a positive response to the question, 'Do you want eggs?' could safely be considered a negative response."
--A guy at Jupiter.
At a Book Signing
Submitted by gutman on Wed, 01/21/2004 - 8:03am. Wisdom
While waiting in line to have Brad Meltzer sign his newest book after a reading of the first chapter at a New York Barnes & Noble, a man on a cell phone:

"I'm at a book signing.... Brad Meltzer.... You know who he is? ... He's an author of books I read."
Why we die
Submitted by elisabeth on Tue, 01/20/2004 - 8:18pm. Wisdom
"I think the only reason we die is because we accept it as an inevitability."
-a friend's 12 year old brother, in the car.
Sad, but true.
Submitted by Saint on Sat, 01/17/2004 - 8:38pm. Wisdom
"Working at Wal-Mart is what happens to you while you're planning how to spend that first million you'll know, someday...after writing your first book and before starring in your first movie. Broken dreams, man. Broken dreams."

--a drunken Wal-Mart employee, sobering up at Denny's. Cortez, CO.
January 11, 2004
Submitted by PurpleCow on Wed, 01/14/2004 - 3:12pm. Wisdom
"Have your teeth ever craved something?"
"Uh... well, my teeth have craved cleansing, but..."
"Because my grandma said her teeth were craving chocolate the other day. Not her mouth, her teeth. And I thought she was crazy, but then this morning I woke up and my TEETH were craving those!"
~Two girls at The Crib, talking about ring pops
12 January 2004
Submitted by eve on Tue, 01/13/2004 - 12:10am. Wisdom
"Now see, why didn't I learn, when you finally get what you most want you don't want it."
"Whoo, you're on fire tonight. Drink your beer."
--Another guy and girl, also in line for the bathroom at Raleigh's.
Submitted by Hunter on Wed, 12/17/2003 - 5:16pm. Wisdom
A story (paraphrased) that my Old English professor told on one of the first days of class:

"My granddaughter had her first day of kindergarten, and she came home all upset because she almost got a frowny-face on something. And I started thinking...she has eight more years of elementary school and junior high, four years of high school, four years undergrad, and possibly endless years of grad school, if she goes into the Humanities...think of how many thousands of frowny-faces await her!"

One guy's response:

"That's dark and evil!"

But it's true...