"The Grout Gatsby.""
"Frosted Flakes, they're grrrrout!"
"Twist and Grout."
"Grout, damned spot!"
"All a-grout Eve."
"The Groutsiders."
"*sigh* Writing in the cracks is so infanTILE."

--Writings on the bathroom wall of Doe Library

"Drugs were easier to deal with than people are now."
"No, reality is for people who can't handle drugs."
"'We're actors, we're the opposite of people'--Tom Stoppard"

--Three entries written on the bathroom wall of Au Coquelet Cafe

"You haven't kept in touch with Claudia? Oh my gawd, she totally hasn't changed a bit.
Get this: she was dating airline pilots. Not one, but TWO and they were both, like, 10 years older than her. Monday one would fly in, the other would fly out to Singapore, Wednesday the other would fly back, the first one would fly to New York, and she basically had a date every night of the week and never needed an alibi."
*pause*
"Seriously. If they ever traded shifts? She'd probably call 'em by the wrong name."
--A girl talking on a cell phone

"I don't think it's possible to trudge sexily."
--A girl speaking very seriously

---

...which is precisely why Victoria's Secret models are never shown backpacking. (That, and the fact that camping in lingere might be both impractical and cold.)

"I wish the humanities requirement for EECS was less."
--A guy sitting behind me in CS lecture

---

For those who aren't Berkeley students: EECS is Electrical Engineering & Computer Science, and the humanities requirement is pretty damn low as it is, and the stereotype of folks in that major is somewhat *ahem* robotic.

"If I fail, it's not because I didn't try, or because I didn't work hard enough... Sometimes your party just sucks."
--Overheard during the first day of classes

---

Now there's an inspirational message for college freshmen everywhere.

"Yeah, so at the cafe yesterday the esperanto club was meeting so I couldn't get a table."
"Wait, I had spanish, I should know what that word is... esperanto means, um..."
"No, no, it's not a noun, it's a language. I knew two girls once who were, like, native speakers from birth. You know... it's that universal language."
"Oh, the one that no one speaks?"
--A guy and a girl exiting lecture behind me

"Wait, wait, you think MY friends are flaky for wanting to come here? YOU'RE the one whose friends were hosting the 'Goddess Gathering.'"
--A rather upset guy talking to his female companion at Berkeley's world music festival

"No, I'm fine with her, I like her even for short visits, it's just sometimes... she's too much. I mean, it's just like alcohol: a little is good, fun, too much and you'll puke."
"Yeah... Not to mention the fact that she's usually drunk."
--Two girls waiting in line to buy tickets at the bart station.

"It's so genuine, and natural. There's just a certain... purity about it."
"Hey, it's just a smoothie."
--Two guys outside of Juice Appeal