This almost went under "Wisdom"
Submitted by Saint on Thu, 11/13/2003 - 8:18am. Graffiti
Driver who drink like fish
Often sleep with fishes
Learn to swim

--Seen on the bathroom wall of the Purple Sage. Cortez, CO.
Disappearance of the Anasazi
Submitted by Saint on Fri, 10/24/2003 - 3:33pm. Funny
"So what's the deal with that Anasazi Burger?"
"It's made with real Anasazis."
"So that's what happened to them."

--A customer, a line cook, and another customer, at Spruce Tree Terrace, Mesa Verde National Park.
Weasel or mind game?
Submitted by Saint on Wed, 10/22/2003 - 3:49pm. Funny
"Hey, man, why didn't you let yourself in? I didn't lock it."
"I did, and then I let myself out after your ferret f*cking bit me."
*pause* "Dude...I don't have a ferret."

--two guys on the floor below, Centennial Apartments, Fort Lewis College. Durango, CO.
I heard this years ago, while I was attending school there, and visiting a friend in the Centennials. Haven't thought about it in a long time, but today I have rodents on the brain.
Just looking
Submitted by Saint on Tue, 10/14/2003 - 8:48pm. Funny
"Hi, can I help you?"
"Nah, I'm just looking."
*sigh* "Yeah, me too. I was just looking, and they put me to work."

--An employee and a customer in Front Row Seat. Cortez, CO.
Judgement day is here
Submitted by Saint on Mon, 10/13/2003 - 7:47pm. Scenes
Seen at a Main St stoplight in Cortez, CO: A scrawny blonde man holding up a wooden cross about six inches taller than he is, with a plaque reading "Jesus" nailed to the crosspiece. As traffic passes, he gives the drivers thumbs-up, then gestures wildly at his cross as if someone might miss it if he didn't point it out.

A coworker suggested that perhaps the man was hitchiking, and wanted potential rides to know he was a Christian.
It's a sign
Submitted by Saint on Wed, 10/08/2003 - 10:08pm. Graffiti
WOOD FOR SALE does beavers good

--a sign by Hwy 666 (oh, excuse me, Hwy 491 now)
Stand up for your rights
Submitted by Saint on Tue, 10/07/2003 - 12:39am. Tragic
"I dunno, maybe she's right."
"She is not right. Stand up to her! She has to accept you for who you are, or she's not worth your time. You're a pot smoker, and if she can't deal with that, she needs to just find someone else."

--a guy and a girl waiting in line for Underworld in the High Five Cinema. Durango, CO.
My girl IS that dirty
Submitted by Saint on Sat, 10/04/2003 - 10:40am. Graffiti
"I wish my girl was this dirty"

--Seen written in the dirt on the side of a car, Wal-Mart parking lot, Cortez, CO.

I almost filed this under "bizarre" because almost the exact same graffiti appears as a toss-off in a book I read a couple of years ago (I think it was Storm by Boris Starling, but I couldn't swear to it).
Look, it's funny, really, I'm not crazy
Submitted by Saint on Sat, 10/04/2003 - 9:30am. Graffiti
1st handwriting: Give piece a chance.
2nd handwriting: Can't we all just git it on?

--Seen on a bathroom wall in Wal-Mart, Cortez, CO

No one ever understands why I find this so funny. *sigh*
A valid title.
Submitted by Saint on Sat, 10/04/2003 - 9:06am. Funny
"Truly. You are the mashed potatoes."

--A deadpan girl to another girl leaving Hot Topic with a bag full of goth goodies. In the Westlake Mall, Seattle.