"...and if they phone up wanting to transfer we can always just send someone round with a baseball bat and smash up their business; 'You have less than 1000 pounds in your fund, NO YOU CAN'T TRANSFER!'"
- co-worker, I'm sure he was joking but I won't tell you where I work just in case :P

"I was trying to figure out if it was urine or bong water"
- my friend at the pub last year, talking about waking up on New Years Day 2004.

A rocket scietist couldn't play guitar, I could

- guy sitting across from me at work

"I like being able to say that; 'We'll worry about it next year'"

-co-worker

Given the date I know it makes sense but I thought it sounded good anyway.

"Is that your rebel quality? Playing Nat-King Cole at a moderate volume?"

- a co-worker, commenting on my boss's stand against the "no music before noon" rule on x-mas eve here

"You can't be a sex kitten when you're feet are hanging six inches off the ground!"

- Woman in my office - no I didn't catch any more than that, sadly