"I started at the end of the street, and I wasn´t shouting -- I wasn´t hysterical. I was just talking very loudly LIKE THIS. And I walked down the row of houses, and I said,`Shame on all of you. All of you! We have lived in this neighborhood for 5 years. We have kept to ourselves! We have bothered no one! And not one of you has ever, ever, shown us welcome, love, or chartiable actions. Shame on all of you.`"
"Oh goodness, she must have known you meant her."
"No, but Janey, she was almost as bad originally, and sure enough she shows up on my doorstep the next day with 50 yellow roses and an invitation to their barbeque. They´re just lucky I didn´t get hysterical."
--Two women talking over brunch

"I always feel thinner when I'm tan. You know how black pants are slimming? Dark colors? It's like black pants for your whole body."
"Except black pants don't kill you."
--Two women talking in the produce section at Whole Foods

"I stopped calling myself a refugee when I bought the Audi. I think that's fair."
"Wyclef has a Hummer with a fish tank in it. Refugee All Star."
"Well."
"You should go major league."
--Two guys talking at Caribou Coffee

"Hey, some friends and I are meeting at Men's Room at 12:30 tonight, wanna come?"
"Oh no, I woke up early this morning. 12:30 is like... twice my bed time."
--Two guys on BART.

"No, his Achilles heel can't be his Achilles heel! "
"It's brilliant! It was my idea. Who would expect it?"
--A guy and a girl looking at a laptop at Nomad Cafe

"Do you know what I like? I like how whenever someone says, 'You can drink it like water,' it's always something you shouldn't be drinking at all."
"No, just not that much. Redbull vodka, for example."
"I was thinking about that guy on TV who shows how safe his organic house cleaner is."
--Two guys talking at Berkeley Bowl

"It's never too late to say you're sorry."
"Sometimes people die."
"That would be a good band name."
--Written on the wall of the women's bathroom at Triple Rock