18 January 2000
Submitted by eve on Tue, 09/12/2000 - 1:09am. Funny
"Hey... is Russ there? Yeah, it's Lou, I'm a friend of Jessica's... Look, she told me you might be able to help me out. I need some... health supplements.
*pause* *static*
Oh yeah, sure totally, I've got it right here. Health supplements, like... Vitamin E... and, um, Vitamin K."
--A guy talking to the intercom of the building next door
(Those of you who read dates are scratching your heads--
Yes, this one is nine months old.
In fact, this is the comment that started it all-- after I finished laughing about this one, I started jotting down things I'd heard in a little notebook. I just found it again, so expect to see some more oldies soon.)
11 September 2000
Submitted by eve on Mon, 09/11/2000 - 8:21pm. Funny
"Oh, sorry that didn't get done, last weekend I fell a little behind because I went to Burning Man, but it was worth it."
"But couldn't you have done the reading and at least the multiple choice questions there?"
--Two girls who appeared to be homework partners, in the library
Now, admittedly I've never been to burning man, myself...
But I suspect it's not the kind of place one goes to do homework.
10 September 2000
Submitted by eve on Sun, 09/10/2000 - 10:43pm. Funny
"Whoa... look around. Every woman here has bruised heels, bandaged toes. They look like they've just gotten back from battle."
"Well, I mean, they're all here because of a common interest, and frankly I think it's a form of masochism."
--A man and a woman in DSW Shoe Warehouse in SF (specializing in pointy-toed, high heeled shoes.)
8 September 2000
Submitted by eve on Fri, 09/08/2000 - 11:22am. Funny
"You just can't say that, it's blasphemy or something..."
"But God did layeth a smacketh down on the egyptians."
--People from two different groups, both trying to recruit passers by on Sproul plaza, getting into a bit of a debate of ideals.
31 August 2000
Submitted by eve on Fri, 09/01/2000 - 5:03pm. Funny
"You haven't kept in touch with Claudia? Oh my gawd, she totally hasn't changed a bit.
Get this: she was dating airline pilots. Not one, but TWO and they were both, like, 10 years older than her. Monday one would fly in, the other would fly out to Singapore, Wednesday the other would fly back, the first one would fly to New York, and she basically had a date every night of the week and never needed an alibi."
"Seriously. If they ever traded shifts? She'd probably call 'em by the wrong name."
--A girl talking on a cell phone
28 August 2000
Submitted by eve on Tue, 08/29/2000 - 8:31pm. Funny
"Yeah, so at the cafe yesterday the esperanto club was meeting so I couldn't get a table."
"Wait, I had spanish, I should know what that word is... esperanto means, um..."
"No, no, it's not a noun, it's a language. I knew two girls once who were, like, native speakers from birth. You know... it's that universal language."
"Oh, the one that no one speaks?"
--A guy and a girl exiting lecture behind me
27 August 2000
Submitted by eve on Sun, 08/27/2000 - 5:30pm. Funny
"Wait, wait, you think MY friends are flaky for wanting to come here? YOU'RE the one whose friends were hosting the 'Goddess Gathering.'"
--A rather upset guy talking to his female companion at Berkeley's world music festival
26 August 2000
Submitted by eve on Sun, 08/27/2000 - 5:29pm. Funny
"No, I'm fine with her, I like her even for short visits, it's just sometimes... she's too much. I mean, it's just like alcohol: a little is good, fun, too much and you'll puke."
"Yeah... Not to mention the fact that she's usually drunk."
--Two girls waiting in line to buy tickets at the bart station.
22 August 2000
Submitted by eve on Thu, 08/24/2000 - 12:44pm. Funny
"It's so genuine, and natural. There's just a certain... purity about it."
"Hey, it's just a smoothie."
--Two guys outside of Juice Appeal
21 August 2000
Submitted by eve on Thu, 08/24/2000 - 12:39pm. Funny
"And after 5 minutes she tells my that my putter was obviously obsolete."
--A man about 50 years old, talking to another guy in line at the ATM
...And so I'm wondering, was he talking to a golf pro about his swing, or was he talking to a new woman in his life?