22 October 2004
Submitted by eve on Fri, 10/22/2004 - 7:58am. Wisdom
"I hate to say it, but have you considered transferring your affections to a team with less of a suck factor? "
"No, see, that's the problem. Once the local guys lose, then I automatically root for whoever's the underdog."
"Oh, so you're screwed by design, then. You should reconsider that. Might be a less frustrating experience."
--A girl and a guy at Andronico's
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Random link.
Posted by Saint on Thu, 12/09/2004 - 4:34pm.
I don't know why, but I find this endlessly diverting--to the frustration of my wife, who has been trying to make me help her clean all day. Work-safe non-annoying flash.
Friday song
Posted by peegee on Fri, 11/26/2004 - 6:05am.
'Rooting for a team with a suck factor' would appropriately summarize this weeks choice of mine for a friday song. It's funny, it's sarcastic, it's Steely Dan - how much better can it get...

Steely Dan - Deacon Blues

This is the day of the expanding man
That shape is my shade, there where I used to stand
It seems like only yesterday I gazed through the glass
At ramblers
Wild gamblers
That's all in the past

You call me a fool, you say it's a crazy scheme
This one's for real, I already bought the dream
So useless to ask me why
Throw a kiss and say goodbye
I'll make it this time
I'm ready to cross that fine line

I'll learn to work the saxophone
I'll play just what I feel
Drink Scotch whisky all night long
And die behind the wheel
They got a name for the winners in the world
I want a name when I lose
They call Alabama the Crimson Tide
Call me Deacon Blues

My back to the wall a victim of laughing chance
This is for me the essence of true romance
Sharing the things we know and love
With those of my kind
That stagger the mind

I crawl like a viper through these suburban streets
Make love to these women languid and bittersweet
I'll rise when the sun goes down
Cover every game in town
A world of my own
I'll make it my home sweet home


This is the night of the expanding man
I take one last drag as I approach the stand
I cried when I wrote this song
Sue me if I play too long
This brother is free
I'll be what I want to be

I saw Arlo Guthrie last night.
Posted by paul on Tue, 11/02/2004 - 12:49pm.
'Nuff said.

Well, other than that I wore my autographed tee shirt to the polls.
Yay, Arlo!
Posted by Desert Fox on Sat, 11/06/2004 - 9:38am.
I'm jealous! I haven't seen Arlo for years. The past couple of times he's been through San Diego, he's played up in Escondido, which is an inconvenient drive up the ever-congested I-15 from San Diego proper.

"I don't wanna pickle...."


"Life is too short for grief. Or regret. Or bullshit." -- Edward Abbey, Vox Clamantis in Deserto
The last time
Posted by paul on Sat, 11/06/2004 - 5:41pm.
I went to a Renaissance Faire, every time I saw someone selling pickels out of a barrel I would start singing that song...

And yes, he did perform that one. And in his encore he did a variant on Alice's Restaurant that was in some ways better than hearing him do the full original version...
Posted by umrguy on Sat, 11/06/2004 - 11:41am.
You at least make it sound as if you have seen him before... I've not even gotten that far, although my dad actually got to meet him back in the early 70s, when Arlo was staying at a relative's house in St. Louis, who happened to be a classmate and friend of my dad. Yet another on the list of cool things my own parental unit's done that I can't come close to topping...

Yeah, I'm jealous :)

-There's someone in my head, but it's not me.-
Well then, go see him!
Posted by paul on Sat, 11/06/2004 - 5:38pm.
He still tours constantly, according to his website. There should be a show somewhere near enough to you to go to.

One of my favorite parts was when he was going on about what one man can do (alluding to voting). He started out telling the story of Joseph and how all Joseph's brothers hated him and how when he was sent out to help herd the sheep he couldn't find them anywhere but this one guy standing in the field said "They went that way", and how he found them off in the trees plotting what to do with Joseph and how they sold him to a caravan and he went to Egypt where he ended up in prison... Arlo went on through all of this for a good five minutes at least, going through the Biblical stories up through Jesus and all, right up to the present day, and then said "And you see how much of history pivoted on that one anonymous guy standing in the field, pointing his finger and saying 'They went that way'?"

Only Arlo can ramble on through a story like that one and get a belly laugh out of everyone in the room.
Posted by steff on Sat, 11/06/2004 - 12:32pm.
thanksgiving is just around the corner.
Posted by umrguy on Wed, 11/03/2004 - 7:44am.
Arlo rocks ;) Also, because of that (I realize it's the day after, but still...), you could take the following and substitute "Dubya" for Lyndon...

This is an old Lyndon Johnson campaign song. Well, Lyndon comes from Texas, you know, and this song is an old Texas song that Lyndon learned when he wanted to become president. And he didn't rewrite it, it's just the same way it always was.

Yes, I know I've been untrue
And I have hurt you through and through
But please have mercy on this heart of mine
Won't you take me back and try me one more time

In my dreams I see your face
It seems like there's someone in my place
But does he know that you were once mine
Won't you take me back and try me one more time

If you come back to me now
I'll make it up to you somehow
I promise to never be unkind
If you'll take me back and try me one more time
Won't you take me back and try me one more time

-There's someone in my head, but it's not me.-
Election Tuesday Songfest!!
Posted by brian65401 on Tue, 11/02/2004 - 12:17pm.
Vote for me, vote for me
I want the nomination for the Presidency
Vote for me, vote for me
If I am elected, this is how it will be.
I'll cut your tax in half
I'll make the Russians laugh
I'll feed the hungry people everywhere.
I'll bring the railroads back
New trains and new track
From Waikiki to old Delaware.
Vote for me, vote for me
I want the nomination for the Presidency
Vote for me, vote for me
If I am elected, this is how it will be.
I'll give Detroit one year
New cars that run on beer
Or anything except gasoline.
I'm looking to the sun
More power for everyone
And the cleanest sky that you've ever seen.
I'm not going to kid you, there's a lot to do
Little can I promise, it's really up to you
But if we all work together
And I think we can
And if you want some new ideas
Then I'm your man.
Vote for me, vote for me
I want the nomination for the Presidency
Vote for me, vote for me
If I am elected, this is how it will be.
I'll work for global peace
And the sweet release
Of the love and human kindness in us all.
I would give all I've got
You just give me a shot
Somehow, I know that I can win the fall.

CHICAGO - "Vote For Me"
For Today (cross-posted to my LiveJournal)
Posted by umrguy on Tue, 11/02/2004 - 11:09am.
I'm your top prime cut of meat, I'm your choice,
I wanna be elected,
I'm your yankee doodle dandy in a gold Rolls Royce,
I wanna be elected,
Kids want a saviour, don't need a fake,
I wanna be elected,
We're all gonna rock to the rules that I make,
I wanna be elected

I never lied to you, I've always been cool,
I wanna be elected,
I gotta get the vote, and I told you 'bout school,
I wanna be elected
Hallelujah, I wanna be selected,
Everyone in the United States of America.

We're gonna win this one, take the country by storm,
We're gonna be elected,
You and me together, young and strong,
We're gonna be elected
Respected, selected, call collected,
I wanna be elected

"And if I am elected
I promise the formation of a new party
A third party, the Wild Party!
I know we have problems,
We got problems right here in Central City,
We have problems on the North, South, East and West,
New York City, Saint Louis, Philadelphia, Los Angeles,
Detroit, Chicago,
Everybody has problems,
And personally, I don't care."

-There's someone in my head, but it's not me.-
Posted by peegee on Tue, 11/02/2004 - 7:31am.
Seeing how "teams with a suck factor", "screwed by design" and "frustrating experiences" factor into this quote, this seemed the appropriate place to put this: being late for the traditional friday song I resort to 'Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking', still in the guise of a song, namely:

Kashmir - Vote 4 Dick Taid

come on faithful sons
we'll blow away the ballless ones
set their long grey hair on fire
put their fingers on a wire
your daddy that is me
I take responsibility
a simple fee is all it takes to wash away your agony

I offer you work so I can eat and drive expensive vehicles
as you see I'm the only one here
I gave you a life, a bite to eat, I'm your only miracle
you got to love not fear
....your dadadadadadadadyoh
....your dadadadadadadadyoh

some day by accident I will become the president
'cuz you will waste your votes on me
and I will reign it permanent
my tongue on salt through years
have made my verbal boundaries disappear
I spoke my way through fear
applause, I'm taught to lie sincere

I offer you work so I can eat...

all of the money I put into you
made days sunny and forced you to love me
daddy will never be crying the blues
dumb fuck rebels are promised to lose...trust me

I have never believed in anything but myself
now you must be wondering
how in the world I could make it so big
with a couple of hands and a gun
my own daddy taught me to hate myself
for all surroundings close you shell you're put here to work
and raise your sister suffer no moan my son

I offer you work so I can eat....
Can a Dane...
Posted by ParU on Tue, 11/02/2004 - 6:22pm.
Use an American slang term? Is that allowed?
It's Amino world without Chemists
If This Were Minnesota...
Posted by Pizza Delivery Guy on Sun, 10/31/2004 - 5:55pm.
It could have been any of our teams. We always seem to win when it isn't that important, but fail horribly when it counts.
Screwed by design
Posted by Monk on Thu, 10/28/2004 - 2:46pm.
I like this phrase...screwed by design. I shall adopt it and nurish it and make it my very own. Perhaps it will be a band name. Perhaps a book title. Or maybe it's just a mantra.....


Posted by Mike on Thu, 10/28/2004 - 12:22pm.
Ah, lots of people have that weakness. Because if your chosen team improves after you attach yourself to them, it's because they feed off of your greatness, not because of practice or sheer dumb luck or anything!

I hear this is also a big influence in relationships. I wonder who this guy is dating?
Posted by Matt on Thu, 10/28/2004 - 10:26pm.
My guess is no one.

And not for a really long time. Dateless for many months, possibly years in the past, and probably for the next several months, possibly years.
Posted by hypoxic on Thu, 10/28/2004 - 8:20am.
not just root for the local team through their ups and downs. They all have them so why keep torturing yourself with the losers? Unless you really like the Clippers.
Posted by daen on Thu, 10/28/2004 - 2:29pm.
Well, once you get into playoff season and your team has been eliminated, it's nice to be cheering for someone who is actually playing.
Posted by ParU on Thu, 10/28/2004 - 8:50pm.
the Red Sox!! Especially since they beat the Demon's Spawn...
Course I used to like the 49ers and now they have a HUGE suck factor, bring back David W. Gibson! (2 cool pts if you know who THAT refers to.)
It's Amino world without Chemists
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