13 February 2004
Submitted by eve on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 9:46am. Um...
"Today's Drink Reccommendation: A venti coffee in a grande cup.
Reminds Me Of: A foggy morning in London, walking around, seeing the Eiffel Tower."
--The coffee of the day reccomendation, written by "Lizzie", who is either Starbucks' most subversive or least intelligent employee.

For the record, I'm still anti-Starbucks. I have fewer choices when I'm traveling, though. Where by "fewer" I often mean "none."
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Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:46pm.
fuck fuck fuck fuck

give me a minute, ok?

and make media player repeat! please! I'd do it myself, but it's all in Chinese.

shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:48pm.
I think I broke something.

shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Honestly. THe media player thing.
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:29pm.
shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Like humans do
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:34pm.
david byrne
shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Cha or te
Posted by hypoxic on Fri, 02/20/2004 - 8:34am.
Macao has an interesting museum that speaks about where those two names came from. Though I'd only recommend Macao for a day trip. Work it into a Hong Kong trip and you'll be all good.
Yes! It's finally Friday, an
Posted by Obsidiana on Fri, 02/20/2004 - 8:33am.
Yes! It's finally Friday, and I can post the song that this quote has made me think of since it was posted!

"The Metro" by Berlin
I'm alone
sitting with my empty glass
my four walls
follow me through my past
I was on a Paris train
I emerged in London rain
and you were waiting there
swimming through apologies

I remember searching for the perfect words
I was hoping you might change your mind
I remember a soldier sleeping next to me
riding on the Metro

You wore white
smiling as you took my hand
so removed
we spoke of wintertime in France
minutes passed with shallow words
years have passed and still the hurt
I can see you now
smiling as I pulled away

I remember the letter wrinkled in my hand
"I'll love you always" filled my eyes
I remember a night we walked along the Seine
riding on the Metro

I remember a feeling coming over me
the soldier turned, then looked away
I remember hating you for loving me
riding on the Metro
Posted by Matt on Tue, 02/17/2004 - 8:53pm.
Appropos of nothing, I saw the coolest bumper sticker on the way home from yoga tonight. It said, "I poke badgers with spoons."

If I have to explain, it won't be funny.
Hee hee hee. i've seen that s
Posted by Cebu on Wed, 02/18/2004 - 6:28am.
hee hee hee. i've seen that sticker for sale. i went for a weird squirrel one instead.
Posted by umrguy on Wed, 02/18/2004 - 7:41am.
There's somebody here at Rolla who has some kind of weird thing about squirrels - there are stuffed and toy ones in their car, along with a sign saying something like "Beware the Squirrel", and they've gone so far as to get a license plate "SQWRLY".

Bizarre, if you ask me. Reminds me a bit of Kathy Bates' character from Rat Race...

-There's someone in my head, but it's not me.-
Okay, I'm lame
Posted by Alice on Wed, 02/18/2004 - 12:30am.
Could you explain anyway? It seems to tantalizingly familiar, but I just can't place it!
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:33pm.
shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Posted by Matt on Thu, 02/19/2004 - 10:25am.
It's an Eddie Izzard reference from his 1998 show, "Dress To Kill," while he's riffing on original sin.

"Vicar, I lust after my neighbor's wife."
"Mmmn uh. Heard it. I said an original sin!"
"Oh, terribly sorry."

"Vicar, I poked a badger with a spoon."
"Oooh, that's a new one."
Hijacking the thread...
Posted by ParU on Mon, 02/16/2004 - 3:49pm.
Just thought the whole IP community should know that Eve just had a birthday!
It's Amino world without Chemists
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:35pm.
shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Posted by peegee on Tue, 02/17/2004 - 9:51am.
From across the pond (and thereby almost on topic) I'll pitch in a belated "Tillykke med fødselsdagen, Eve". To my great personal likening most Danish birthday songs stress the importance of getting, in addition to nice presents, lots of chocolate and cake on your birthday, and hordes of birthday guests to share them with. The former of which are full of evil carbohydrates and - no wait, that is another thread...
Posted by paul on Mon, 02/16/2004 - 9:31pm.
So how old is our site goddess now? And which one of us gets to give her the spanking and the pinch to grow an inch?

*elbowing aside Monk, tim, Ameroogie and a host of others*
Posted by Matt on Mon, 02/16/2004 - 9:53pm.
Paul, the comment about you having no shame is so obvious, I'm not sure why I even bother.

23 or 24, I think.
I ain't saying...
Posted by ParU on Tue, 02/17/2004 - 11:46am.
But I think were Paul to try to pinch her he might end up with a sore face or other region. But she's often on the East coast these days (in Virginia too!) Paul, so maybe you'll run into her.
It's Amino world without Chemists
I can only hope...
Posted by paul on Tue, 02/17/2004 - 5:50pm.
Well then, ParU, you have my personal info. Tell her to call me sometime and I'll take her out for a beer.
Virginia? Uh-oh.
Posted by Larry Hosken on Tue, 02/17/2004 - 3:01pm.
Is she selling intelligence agencies a way to keep track of all of the information that they overhear?
Posted by paul on Mon, 02/16/2004 - 10:42pm.
You're just jealous because you didn't post it first.

BTW, here's a comic specifically for this website, it seems...
Many happy returns
Posted by marinerd on Mon, 02/16/2004 - 3:59pm.
Well, ParU, let me be the first to congratulate you on the anniversary of your becoming a father to a bonnie baby daughter! I know it's a moment you'll never forget.

Oh, and happy birthday to Eve, too! And many, many more!!
Posted by Shade on Sun, 02/15/2004 - 4:51pm.
A store I'm working for is doing inventory tonight. I arrived at work yesterday to find a sign posted to the effect that we would be closing early so that we could hold our inventory count. The last sentence of our sign read, "We are sorry for any incontinence."

I, too, was torn between a verdict of subversive or one of dumbness.
"We are sorry for any inconti
Posted by Apple on Sun, 02/15/2004 - 6:22pm.
"We are sorry for any incontinence."
The accuracy of the statement Depends on what you sell in the store.
"Serenity now!"
Gotta give...
Posted by ParU on Mon, 02/16/2004 - 3:44pm.
A Rim Shot point to Apple for that one! And a cool pt to shade for an on topic IP IRL post.
It's Amino world without Chemists
Friday Song
Posted by Joe Napalm on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 7:51pm.
El Amore De Mi Vida - Warren Zevon w/ Willie Nelson

I close my eyes, you reappear
I always carry you inside, in here
I fall asleep, you come to me
And once again our love is real

How could I have let you get away
Why couldn't I have found a way to say

"Tu eres el amor de mi vida
Si solo te pudiera encontrar
Con todo el corazon te diria
Tu eres mi amor de verdad"

I look outside, I know you're there
And you've found a brand new life somewhere
I only wish it had been us
But I'm happy for your happiness

How could I ever let you go
How will I ever let you know

"Tu eres el amor de mi vida
Si solo te pudiera encontrar
Con todo el corazon te diria
Tu eres mi amor de verdad"

"Tu eres mi amor,
tu eres mi amor,
ti eres mi amor de verdad"

"Tu eres mi amor,
tu eres mi amor,
tu eres mi amor de verdad"

Efreeti Sophist
El corazon
Posted by steff on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 5:17am.
on that note, happy flippin' valentine's day, everyone. yech... if i see one more pink mylar heart, i'm gonna shove it up - uh - look, a link! plenty more where that came from, folks. consider it a jumping off point.

"remember the massacre!"
Posted by paul on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 4:05pm.
Chocolate and sex. What a great holiday. *gryn*
So who needs a holiday for th
Posted by Desert Fox on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 7:22pm.
So who needs a holiday for that?

"Life is too short for grief. Or regret. Or bullshit." -- Edward Abbey, Vox Clamantis in Deserto
Good point.
Posted by paul on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 10:17pm.
Yer my kinda woman, Desert Fox...

...or, in light of the topic, should that be Dessert Fox?...
Desert vs. Dessert
Posted by Desert Fox on Sun, 02/15/2004 - 10:50am.
Nah, Desert is much more accurate. I'm a whole lot drier than I am sweet.


"Life is too short for grief. Or regret. Or bullshit." -- Edward Abbey, Vox Clamantis in Deserto
I'm reminded of this quote fr
Posted by Wark on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 6:08pm.
I'm reminded of this quote from Britney Spears:

"I get to travel to overseas countries, like Canada."

Isn't it great to know how educated in Geography America's youth is?
Geography.. ignorance in general
Posted by Somnambulist on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 3:39am.
I read somewhere that there is a significant percentage of school-aged americans that can't understand why Alaska would be so cold, since it's an island off the coast of Mexico, right next to Hawaii. I met a lady on a plane that was convinced that the northern lights was a scam that was created to bring tourists to Alaska...
Posted by marinerd on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 2:06pm.
Even though I live in the coffee capital of the world, and the birthplace of Starbucks, I never touch the stuff, myself. Who needs coffee to hallucinate?

But my coffee-drinking kids tell me that Starbucks sucks. That's good enough for me.
But their pastry rocks...
Posted by TheEileen on Fri, 03/26/2004 - 4:10pm.
What can I say? I used to live in San Francisco and now I live here and I got started on Starbucks for two reasons. #1 - They had (and still have) the best pastry I can find (not too gooey, not all donuts, not all crappy cinnamon rolls) and #2 - I can sit there for six hours reading a book in a comfy chair and drink one cup of coffee and no one bugs me.

Oh, and #3 - I know the names of all the staff and they know me. It may be "corporate" training, but it brings me back. "Hi Eileen, do you want your usual today or would you like to try the chocolate crossoint this time?" Yes, it's luverly.

I sit in the silent majority here, cuz someone has to be drinking this stuff it there's a shop at every corner.

The Eileen
Take the road not taken - the leaves crunch that much louder!
Me too!
Posted by slugbuggy on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 1:35pm.
I want my large coffee in a medium cup, if that's the new cool way to do it.

It reminds me of that time in Prague, watching the whaling ships lazily meandering down the Nile.
Posted by Matt on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 11:36am.
Okay, so if "venti" is Italian for 20 (thank you, Google Language Tools), what the hell is in that cup? And isn't Starbucks the company that has two basic cup sizes, tall and grande, but only one of them is actually a large?

And Lizzie, babe, if you can see Big Ben on a foggy morning in London, you're doing better than most.
Punctuation problems?
Posted by Desert Fox on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 11:31am.
Maybe those should have been semicolons instead of commas? Or at least individual sentence fragments? On the other hand, if I drank coffee, I wouldn't be very tempted by the fact that drinking a particular type would remind me of 'walking around'. Weird.

My gripe with Starbucks, besides the fact that they are a paragon of Corporate Evil(tm), is that tea-drinkers seem to confuse them. I also only go there when desperate and without other choices -- in airports, in other words -- where I have this conversation each and every time:

"Hot tea, please."
"Would you like cherry, passionfruit, mango, grape, banana...."
"I want tea. Black. With caffeine. In a very large cup."
"Oh, you want Earl Grey?"
"No, I want tea that only tastes like tea. Not like perfume. Not like fruit. Just TEA."



"Life is too short for grief. Or regret. Or bullshit." -- Edward Abbey, Vox Clamantis in Deserto
The Evil Empire
Posted by Dolmena on Thu, 06/03/2004 - 3:04pm.
I know someone who used to freely tell people she worked for "The Evil Empire." They knew she was talking about Starbucks.

Then she got a different job and stayed with Starbucks part-time because the insurance she had with them was good-- and she could keep it at part time status. Evil?

I'm not so sure. True, we don't have as many non-bookstore coffeehouses around as we used to 10 years ago, but then 2 local coffeehouse owners freaked out within a year of each other, and another... is a wonderful person but sucks as a manager. And, as far as human resources go, I couldn't get affordable insurance of my own for years after I stopped working in food or retail.

I remember when it was hard to get people in restaurants to even understand that I wanted hot tea (not iced.) And the only flavored coffee you could get had alcohol in it, and "coffee" was Maxwell House if you were lucky. It cost from 30 cents up to a dollar USA, and almost worth it. QYB.


I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott
Preach it, sister
Posted by steff on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 4:26pm.
"tea!! i just want some properly made teeeeeeeeea!!" instead? almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.
Posted by Alice on Wed, 02/18/2004 - 12:20am.
Eeeeh! Douglas Adams!
I get so happy whenever someone quotes him! And I agree, starbucks is not a great place for tea-drinkers, but then, neither is Spain, where I spent the last few months. Getting a cup of tea in a Spanish cafe was always a challenge, as whatever I ordered was inevitably wrong. If I asked for "te," they would blink bewilderedly and say "infusion?" and if I said "infusion," they would blink bewilderedly and say "te?" Don't get me started on Spanish Starbucks, which are overwhelmingly awful at everything, especially tea.

"Sorry for the inconvenience."
Posted by Yuri on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 5:40pm.
If you work it right, it is entirely possible to have both tea and no tea at the same time.
Coffee flavored coffee...
Posted by ParU on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 3:33pm.
I'm with you DF, but in regards to coffee. Denis Leary has an absolutely hilarious bit regarding his search for 'just coffee', coffee flavored coffee.
My kids think (know) my tastes are pedestrian, but I LIKE Dennys/coffee shop coffee. Starbucks/et al. stuff is what I call 'Berkeley coffee'. The stuff that they used to serve at Cafe Roma (called something else now - it's at Bancroft and College Ave). I used to look for the little tug boats with their oil slick booms in the coffee cup, the stuff had that much 'oil' in it.
Runs and hides from his daughter's righteous wrath
Posted by Matt on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 5:58pm.
All of a sudden, I smelled... maple syrup in the car. Who spilled maple syrup in my car? I pulled over and realized... it was coming from my coffee! Someone spilled maple syrup in my coffee! So I took it back to the kid at the 7-Eleven and said, "Hey, buddy, someone spilled maple syrup in my coffee. "Naw, man, that's our flavor of the month, Maple Nut Crunch."

Maple. Nut. Crunch. Are you going to tell me that Juan Valdez is down in Bogota right now farming a field full of maple nuts? I don't think so! As a matter of fact, I bet my left maple nut that he's not! You don't know shit about shit and pull up your pants!

I want to use that last line on someone someday.

Granted, I'm not a big coffee guy, but I didn't know coffee came without oil. I thought that's just how it is. Ah well.
Mis dos centimos
Posted by Alice on Wed, 02/18/2004 - 12:27am.
Juan Valdez actually drinks Costa Rican coffee. The ticos are very proud of this. Apparently, he imports it by the caseload. I'm generally coffee ignorant, but if Juan Valdez imports someone else's coffee, it's got to be good.
Great quote...
Posted by ParU on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 10:38am.
Matt - where'd you find it online? Of course the whole rant is better when you hear it. And the pull up your pants bit was a 'comeback' to the start of the bit.
It's Amino world without Chemists
Posted by Yuri on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 12:26pm.
I have a feeling Matt has probably heard the whole rant. I also have a feeling he could probably recite the whole rant from memory, with proper inflections and righteous indignation.
Posted by Matt on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 5:59pm.
Wow! Yuri is just full of good and accurate feelings today, eh?

Okay, okay: confession time. No, I didn't get it from a website, I typed it from memory, except that I went back to my MP3 of it to double-check the syntax. It's part of a 15-minute file I have called, "Coffee, Beer, and The Pope."

Denis also has a great bit where he talks about being called into a parent-teacher conference because his son was heard singing "an offensive song that included repetition of an extremely dirty word." Denis needled her, but she wouldn't tell him what word. Finally she said, "Mr. Leary, the song is called, 'I'm An Asshole.'" Denis laughed out loud. "Do you know this song, Mr. Leary?" "Know it? I wrote it!"
Posted by Yuri on Sat, 02/14/2004 - 6:06pm.
Accurate feelings, yes; good feelings, perhaps not so much.
Okay, okay
Posted by gareth on Fri, 02/13/2004 - 10:46am.
Poncy overpriced coffee is not a feature of London nostalgia. You can't move for Starbucks and clones thereof in London these days, but the real taste of London coffee can only be found in the greasiest of greasy spoons. I'm talking about two spoonfuls of cheap knockoff instant smothered in boiled milk with a three-inch-thick skin on the top, lightly sprinkled with ash from the cigarette dangling from the owner's lips. Preferably served in a chipped mug bearing the witticism 'My friend went to Torremolinos and all I got was this stupid mug'. A few sips of that and you'll be imagining the Eiffel Tower, the Golden Gate Bridge - anything to take your mind off the taste.

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