I had a roommate last year who had a spastic colon. So one day when I didn't feel like going to work and needed an excuse I borrowed my roommate's malady as an excuse. I told my manager that my spastic colon was acting up and she was so very sweet and concerned, and she started asking me questions -- how long have you had this? are you going to the doctor? are you taking anything for it? -- that I didn't know the answer to. So as a way of trying to get off the phone quickly I made a pained noise and cried out, "Oh! My colon!!" My roommie was listening and laughed her ass off at me and this became one of our catch phrases.

I felt so bad, though, at the outpouring of sympathy and good-will I got from everyone when I went in to work the next day.